chap 1 revamped

Many of you know that I've started to do a little light writing, and some have already read chap 1...but I've revamped it a little. Here's chap 1 2.0. Let me know what you think.

Chapter 1—First Day

Walking down the Main Street of O'Kelly Creek, NC on her first day in town fascinated Anna McLeod Matthison. She remembered the feeling that emanated from the shops and cafes and houses—that quaint, quiet joy found in mountain towns by the tourists who come looking for it. Anna also knew that behind the white picket fences dripping with ivy lingered another face of O'Kelly, the real one unseen by tourists. A town full of tradition and whispers, suspicious of any stranger who stayed through summer and into fall. The half backs, those that moved from New England to Florida and then traveled half way back to Carolina, were welcomed into town for the summers, but most locals were only too happy to watch those same Buicks and Volvos head back south come September.

Anna grew up in the thick of the O'Kelly life. Her mother, Meaghan McLeod, came to the area as a baby with her aunt and uncle, nearly 60 years ago. They came from Ireland, though of Scottish decent, and settled there because of Paddy O'Kelly, Meaghan's great great grandfather who founded the town.

Meaghan inherited Paddy's entrepreneurial spirit and opened a bakery in 1968 on Ryan Avenue, just a block off Main. This shop dominated Anna's earliest memories. She could still hear the sound of the big mixer turning some new creation—smell the cream cheese frosting on her fingers even after they were licked clean—hear the voices of friends and neighbors and tourists sitting around the store. Mostly, she remembered her mother, smiling in colorful aprons and heels, baking while she welcomed everyone. Anna would kneed dough or ice cupcakes and just listen as the adults talked about new businesses moving into the area or the latest match made in O'Kelly or how some hiker heard something again up near Emily's Peak. Whenever this got mentioned, Meaghan would glance at Anna and give who ever was talking a look. They would quiet down real quick, knowing full well they might find Meaghan behind them with a wooden spoon, her Scottish eyes blazing.

Anna, now 28, was no longer a child, and her mother's old bakery no longer wafted deliciousness through the town. In its place stood an outfitting company, complete with solar panels and a watering hole for dogs, owned by two young guys from up in Boone, or so the signed claimed. Anna kind of thought some smart grandmother probably owned it and just used the names of her grandkids for marketing purposes. Those boys probably lived in Nashville.

Finding a little cafe across the street from the Boone Brothers Outfitters, Anna pulled out her journal and started to write, to recollect. Her fiercely loyal Doberman, Sig, relaxed at her feet.

This town appears so dear and easy, and yet it turned so quickly, smoking us out. I'd never seen Mama so afraid as she took me away to a new home. Her words that night haunt me still, “What have I done? What is this place?” She never told me what happened, despite all my questions. Instead, I got a new name, a new school, and she got a new bakery. It all happened so quickly, so finally. She rarely spoke of O'Kelly—but I've thought about it, this pretty mountain town. What lies in its underbelly? What lurks around these hills that frightened my mother so much? I never thought to return despite the questions, but here I am, all because of Nathan—sweet, wise Nathan.

Sighing a little, Anna closed the journal and looked to the surrounding mountains. What in the world am I doing here? She reached down to Sig, and flashes of the final conversation with her mother rang in her ears.

“Oh Anna, your hair! I can't believe how different you look with it short and dark. And what have you done to your nose. Girl...!” She pointed to the nose ring, her mouth hanging open. Meaghan's southern accent always came out despite the 15 years since they left O'Kelly, and the south for that matter.

“I know Mama, I needed a change. You like it?” Anna twirled and smiled.

“You look so pretty, like a little hippy from Seattle. Why the change now? What's in your mind?”

Anna sat down. “Its been two years Mama, and I've got to do something—something new and big. And I've got questions that need answering, so I'm leaving, soon.” She paused, “I'm going back to O'Kelly.”

Meaghan's eyes flashed, then flooded. “So my girl's going home then. Oh I know why you are going—and I know there's no stopping you, no matter what I say. No matter that I think its a terribly dangerous idea. But surely he's gone by now...” She muttered the last part, and Anna barely caught her words. They weren't intended for her.

She responded, “And you won't tell me Mama, you won't say what happened?”

Meaghan pondered for a moment, “Darling, I...I can't. There's not much to say, except that it was my fight, my decisions, and my chapter. That story is long written from my life, but not yours, it would seem. I'm sure it will be quite an adventure. But darling, you've gotta stay secret. They can never know who you really are. I like your haircut even more—you look so different.” Meaghan smiled, then cautioned, “O'Kelly is not what it seems, Maryanne Margaret.” Anna sensed the seriousness in Meaghan's voice. Her southern accent became more pronounced and thick with intensity. “Keep your eyes open and your head on straight—do what is right and good, no matter the cost.” Anna saw a quick sadness in her mother's eyes, which then recovered and smiled again. “And keep your contacts in. It'll do you no good to fall off a mountain, right?”